June 18, 2011 Children and Stress 0 Comments

Tammy’s 5 yr. old granddaughter is very frequently (as Tammy describes it with eyes widened and eyebrows raised) in the “why” about everything right now. Tammy is crazy about her granddaughter but feels she may go nuts with the “why” marathon.

Recently, while riding in the car, Tammy was being bombarded with “why” and decided to try a new tactic. When asked why a flower was purple, Tammy responded, “I don’t know. Why is it purple?” After repeating this in a dance of back-and-forth ping-ponging, her granddaughter gave up with a “nevermind.” Tammy was relieved.

Parenting young children and grandparenting young children will often call for survival tools. Being creative will open doors that may normally feel shut. The point is not only to get unstuck and uncrazy yourself, but to help children move up the ladder of emotional intelligence for growth’s sake as well as for your sake. Sometimes kids just want to connect and hear themselves. Of course, attention-getting of whatever can be gleaned from your attention is a home run. Sometimes there is a missing link they are trying to ‘get’ or understand and don’t, so they repeat themselves in the same way. Finding new angles to help them ‘see’ beyond where they are stuck can be helpful for both of you.

My daughter recently dealt with her toddler son very efficiently when he kept repeating the same question, “Where are we going?” in the car. She asked him, after a couple rounds of being asked the same question, “Where ARE we going, Grayson?” Of course, he responded immediately with the answer. I thought, “Right on!” What she did was not only stop him in his redundant tracks that were taking him nowhere, but also put the responsibility in his lap, helped him to ‘wake up’ and use his mind intelligently, stopping the nonsensical repetition WHILE respecting herself AND her son. Now THAT is what helps grow a Superkid! Great job and applause to the mother of my grandson!

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