The knife was stuck tightly under his jeans into his sock/shoe. I knew the other teen had a weapon, too. They got into a very heated, threatening argument about a girl they both wanted who was present in class. It was in my session at an alternative high school that included teens who could not make it anywhere else in the public school system. They knew more about drugs, sex and violence than I probably ever will. My drums, biofeedback instruments, door prizes and lots of other fun equipment and visual aids always accompanied me to class in a basement that had very little light. Not many wanted to house these young folks. Understandable. Back to the potential fight scene. I had been using biofeedback instruments to demonstrate to the students how hand temp. changes with stress levels and that blaming others gives our power away when we can do something to change our internal world ourselves. No one else is in charge of our internal choices! Breathing slowly and deeply can warm hands and reduce stress level regardless of circumstances around us. So, anyway, they were leaning forward in the group circle with loud voices on the edge of their chairs, one reaching downward for that knife I knew was there. I grabbed the biofeedback temp. trainers and somehow managed to say the right things, not get stabbed or pushed down and get the instruments taped to their fingers. It wasn’t pleasant, mind you, just necessary. I directed them to look at their hand temp. as they were blaming each other for how they felt and were acting defensively. Wish you could have seen their faces. Both of these hot-headed guys realized they were making themselves more stressed by their own thoughts/feelings/actions. A decent conversation ensued using communication skills I’d been teaching them. Voices calmed. They listened to each other and took turns talking. Knives or whatever else never came out to play. This was years ago. All those teens actually boycotted when I had to leave to work for another agency because of budget cuts. I had to go back and work with them to be open to another teacher. When I left they pooled what little money they could come up with and bought goodbye and thank you party decor and a cake. I will never forget them. They were more of my special life teachers.
your breathing technics have helped of with my anger and you know how bad mine was. yesterday was the first time in 17 i had gotten so worked up and angry i wasn’t thinking about or concerned about what could happen or the jail time i could have gotten with a 4 inch blade 8 in total length knife (yes i still always carry a blade but for other reasons like fishing and stuff) i was on my way down the street to go at it. my girlfriend stopped her car next to me told me to get in. i was not thinking she said to breath and walk around her car. in that time i thought what am i doing i could lose her my kids my life for a person that is not worth the air she breaths. i went home and worked on the suburban until i was head to toe in grease. but it was calming and kept me distracted to calm down. the key to any fight. distraction, distract the mind the body will fallow. thank you for teaching me that ~ William Hurst